If you havin girl problems I feel bad for you son:
I got 99 problems, but a bitch ain't one:
I got the Rap Patrol on the gat patrol:
Foes that wanna make sure my casket's closed:
Rap critics that say he's "Money, Cash, Hoes":
I'm from the hood stupid, what type of facts are those?:
If you grew up with holes in your zapatoes:
You'd celebrate the minute you was havin dough:
I'm like fuck critics, you can kiss my whole asshole:
If you don't like my lyrics, you can press fast forward:
Got beef with radio if I don't play they show:
they don't play my hits - well I don't give a shit, SO!:
Rap mags try and use my black ass:
So advertisers can give 'em more cash for ads, fuckers!:
I don't know what you take me as:
Or understand the intelligence that Jay-Z has:
I'm from, rags to riches, niggaz I ain't dumb:
I got 99 problems, but a bitch ain't one - hit me!:

99 problems but a bitch ain't one:
If you havin girl problems I feel bad for you son:
I got 99 problems, but a bitch ain't one - hit me!:

The year is ninety-four, in my trunk is raw:
In my rearview mirror is the motherfuckin law:
Got two choices y'all, pull over the car or (hmm):
bounce on the Devil, put the pedal to the floor:
And I ain't tryin to see no highway chase with Jake:
Plus I got a few dollars, I can fight the case:
So I, pull over to the side of the road:
"Son do you know why I'm stoppin you for?":
Cause I'm young and I'm black and my hat's real low:
Or do I look like a mindreader sir?  I don't know:
Am I under arrest or should I guess some mo'?:
"Well you was doin fifty-five in the fifty-four;:
 license and registration and step out of the car -:
 are you carryin a weapon on you?  I know a lot of you are":
I ain't steppin out of shit, all my papers legit:
"Well do you mind if I look around the car a little bit?":
Well my glove compartment is locked, so is the trunk in the back:
And I know my rights, so you gon' need a warrant for that:
"Aren't you sharp as a tack!  You some type of lawyer or somethin, somebody important or somethin?":
Child I ain't passed the bar, but I know a little bit:
Enough that you won't illegally search my shit:
"Well we'll see how smart you are when the canine comes":
I got 99 problems, but a bitch ain't one - hit me!:

99 problems but a bitch ain't one:
If you havin girl problems I feel bad for you son:
I got 99 problems, but a bitch ain't one - hit me!:

99 problems but a bitch ain't one:
If you havin girl problems I feel bad for you son:
I got 99 problems, but a bitch ain't one - hit me!:

Now once upon a time, not too long ago:
A nigga like myself had to strongarm a hoe:
This is not a hoe in the sense of havin a pussy:
But a pussy havin no God damn sense, try an' push me:
I try to ignore him, talk to the Lord:
Pray for him, but some fools just love to perform:
You know the type, loud as a motorbike:
But wouldn't bust a grape in a fruit fight:
And only thing that's gon' happen is I'ma get to clappin and:
he and his boys gon' be yappin to the Captain:
And there I go, trapped in the Kit-Kat again:
Back through the system with the riff-raff again:
Fiends on the floor, scratchin again:
Paparazzis with they cameras, snappin them:
D.A. try to give a nigga shaft again:
Half a mill' for bail cause I'm African:
All because this fool was harassin them:
Tryin to play the boy like he's saccharin:
But ain't nuttin sweet bout how I hold my gun:
I got 99 problems B and a bitch ain't one - hit me!:
99 problems but a bitch ain't one:
If you havin girl problems I feel bad for you son:
I got 99 problems, but a bitch ain't one - hit me!:
99 problems but a bitch ain't one:
If you havin girl problems I feel bad for you son:
I got 99 problems, but a bitch ain't one - hit me!:
.. Whoo!  Whoo!  Uh, uh:
Havin girl problems I feel bad for you son:
I got 99 problems and a bitch ain't one, ha ha!:
You crazy for this one Rick!  It's your boy!: